Just an acknowledgement, that we have already 17 days since you are not home. And the same number of days since we are waiting to know things about you, and statuses around your health and the time when might return back home.
Things are moving so slow, while I am sure for others time is running too fast to be grabbed. But for us is not the case. This is how it is when you miss someone, and probably this will not get easier.
This is what they were meaning when they said this is a long run, and not a sprint. Is a long run, full of worries, and doubts, and concerns, but also a long run of learning to be dependent on God, to pray, and to ask for help in so many things...
This is yet a moment when we feel small and insignificant in the wider scheme of things, but I know there is more to this, and that by having You as a Father, things are different, and we have grace that will deliver us.
But is ok not to be ok, is ok to feel this ache that is not going away, even though we hear happy music, is ok to feel the sadness and the frustration of not getting the desired information and the desired outcome.
I will continue to count the days till your return, and I am hopeful that God will not end this story like this, but rather differently, and He will reunite us ...hopefully here on Earth, or if not...in a different place, a place where there will be no more pain or suffering, and where tears will no longer be.
I cherish and I value more your tears, now that you are not home with me. I wish I could change the things. But I can not do that. It is like a fire....that is burning us to show the precious metal that we have inside.
It's Christmas, and I like this new carol... an old fashion one...
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