Christmas spirit?

Almost Christmas and i am back in Romania with my holiday for holidays. Things started well with a corporate party which was not that bad, hence it seems like i am getting older and older and i forget how to party. Anyway it was not such a failure as i had a good time.

And then another session of lies and disappointments came. I thought i was use to this, but i am not. I was under the impression that things are now on the right direction, and i found out as usual the last one, that things are not that good. What can i do? I guess not much, just pray to God to fix all the things which are not working currently.

Also, i had some good times because i spent time with my friends and i am getting ready to go to Italy in just a couple of days. This is a good news i hope:) We will see when i get back.

in the meanwhile i had a meeting with a friend from my past, and i ve realized that feelings do not go away so easy and so quick. Although it had been 4 years, since i ve seen him, and spoke to him, i found myself very nervous and smiling, and somehow in love, with him:(.

I thought i was over him, but actually i am not. Amazing was God's power in this, as nothing happened (except for a couple of kisses), because i had the power to tell him, that i am not the same girl he met 4 years ago.

Anyway this meeting made me thinking again, about my life and my loneliness and everything. I just wish things were different. I wish i had someone to count on from all the point of views. I wish to have a family, a husband who will love me for what is inside me, not what he can see on the outside.

God i am asking you to make my prayer come true. I need a shoulder, i need a friend, i need someone who can love me. Please help me !

At work all is good, i am now waiting for the final confirmation regarding my future, which is again in God's hands, and He will make the best of it.

This is it for the moment from Cluj Napoca:)

Have a lovely evening!
And God Bless!

Love Hurts

In order to continue in line with yesterday's topic, love vs carrier, today i would like to spend some time thinking about the sentence Love Hurts.
Is it true? or it is just an old saying?
So currently and also in the past i have found out that the sentence is actually true. Love hurts. Most of the time, when you fall in love, the other one does not share the same feelings, when he is in love with you, you do not share the same feelings, and when you both have feelings and you could make it work, it is not possible due to various circumstances. Is kind of getting frustrating for everyone involved.

This is the story of my life i guess. It is a long time now, since i was involved in a serious relationship, and i kind of missing it. Having someone to hold you when you are sad, or lonely, having someone to laugh with about any stupid jokes, feel loved by someone.

I miss all these things, and i am starting to think when will i have them again. Maybe is my fault, maybe i am doing something wrong, but i am not sure what.
So love indeed hurts.


Also in between the love hurts images is the friendship zone. Now the question is can a boy and a girl just be friends? My answer will be no:) Why?

Because all of the time someone has more than friendship feelings towards the other person....so ...keep out of such situations.

Just a friendly advice...

What else?

Today i have thousands thoughts in my mind? Why, i may ask myself? Why you are hurt when you did not know you had those feelings about something or someone. Life is cruel, and God has his own plan, and several times it is not in line with our expectations. Well we just need to carry on living the life we have, and be happy about it. He has his plan, and his plan is perfect for us.
Of course my worry as of today is again regarding having a family and settling down.
If i look around me at all my friends and people i know, they are slowly settling down, and getting married , only i , i am the one focused on her career.
Sometimes i feel like i am focusing on my career because i do not have anything else to focus on. And actually it is kind of true, because if i was involved in a relationship, a serious commitment i would not spend all my days worrying about my career, my team members and my employer.
Or maybe this is just the comforting idea to think that actually this is the reason for which i am so focused on my job, but in reality, this is how i am, a woman focused on her career, and actually it is an advantage that i do not have a companion because i will make him unhappy, due to the way i treat my work.
Now this is my dilemma for today, should i focus on searching love and a partner, or should i just continue to run for having a career, for being a role model for my team?

December is here

Well, the above picture says it all. I have a small tree, who is meant to fill the space in my lonely existence here in Lublin.
The days at home are passing very very slow, i feel so alone. I am no longer scared in the house or stressed like i used to be, now i am just ALONE. I fell alone, and i am alone.
I am counting the days, 11 to go:) and i ll go home again for holidays. I can not wait.
Another kick today, so finally another chapter of my life is closed. A chapter of lost affection and maybe even love, i will never know. But maybe it is better like this. At least i am not the one standing against other people happiness.
The right person will come for me too, only no one knows when. I really wanted this person to be the one, but clearly is not.
I am to weak, i get involved so quick, i trust people, and get hurt. Not once, not twice but several times now.
I wish i would be more cold, and i wish things would be the other way around.
But God, who sets all the things in the right place, will give me another opportunity, more reachable for me.

God, please help me out with this,
I am asking you with all my heart,

thank you!

One month break ??

Well having this blog is not as easy as i thought :)
I never have enough time to sit and write the things that i have on my mind.
perhaps now that i am alone in Lublin i would manage my time better. Basically i ve been home to Romania, had a blast with my friends and family, and now i am ready for 2 weeks of loneliness in Lublin.
My Joy is at home in Romania with my family, and i ll be back there on the 16th of December.
time will go quickly i am sure, but not on weekends, cause weekends are the hardest time to be alone.

Anyway, i am not bad, will keep you all posted

Is December Christmas spirit all over:)

Let us not forget about Jesus during this time:)

Dog versus dog

As is very cold in Poland, i saw some very special shoes. And i bought them yesterday. They are pink and fluffy and very very very warm. They have eyes and ears and mouth, they are the dog shoes!!!!!!!

I have always loved these shoes so warm and funny and fluffy :). Still my dog was not expecting such a surprise and i ve added some pictures with her reaction to the Dog Shoes.

Already November

November is here in Poland already, time goes so fast, is just amazing. Seems like yesterday it was summer and now out of no where i am waiting for winter.
So 01st of November is a free day here in Poland, and i ve enjoyed it really well.
I ve been cleaning my house, take a bath, and Joy took a bath as well. Then we went to visit a friend of mine, and Joy was all dressed up like a little lady, she was so cute:) I was very happy to see her like that.
Coming back home, i wanted to relax and have a moment just for me, so i took 19 candles and there it was the romantic and relaxing atmosphere, with smell of vanilla all over the room. It was a very nice time that i ve spend with Joy in this perfect set up for relaxation.

So, my batteries are fully charged now, and i can get through this week without any challenges:). Also my booking was confirmed so it looks like in December i am flying home to Romania for a 10 days vacation.
Now here is strange, as i should be jumping of happiness and yet i am not, as i am not sure if i will find my place back at home, and i am not sure if i should go or not.
So...if these feelings reached me now, after 6 months of Poland i am just wondering how the situation will look after 18 months when i am suppose to go back home. But i know God is in charge and he will prepare every little detail.

So this is it for the moment,

Enjoy the pictures with candles and of course Joy :)

Work post

I wanted to have a post for my work, cause things are going really good, and it is a subject that makes me happy these days. Well above is me at work, at my lovely desk, where actually i spend half of my life.
I am here for 6 months, and i am very happy with the things that i ve managed to achieve from a professional point of view. I managed to clear a process and make it really really standardized, and i ve received amazing feedback from the customer. I managed to closed my improvement project and i ve obtained very good results , now i am supporting one of my team members to do another one. I have one manager under my direct supervision, this is a new thing and challenge for me, as i really want to teach him to be a good manager, and not a comunist one.
I have a good relationship with the team now, or at least this is how i feel. Of course the relation with my boss is not as good as i would like, but i hope it will grow. Now i will also enlarge my knowledge in accounts payable, so i am very happy for that.
So i did an excellent job in these 6 months in Lublin, and i am very much aware that all of the above are coming from my Master, from my Father.
I want to thank You Lord for being with me every step of this journey. God it is not my hand that is doing all things, it is your hand guiding me. You are amazing God, you make me do all these things, you give me strength to find motivation and go ahead, without looking back.
Thank you Father, for being there, and thank you for being my Couch, my Manager and my only Father.

Thank you !

My friends in Poland - Second time :)

Well, actually is already two weeks since my friends were here, but i did not have enough time to sit and write about the adventures we had this time in Lublin.
The same friend which came in June, came again this month in October, with two friends, and i was kind of happy to see them.
Actually i have noticed that living alone changed me a little bit. When i ve heard they were coming, i was not jumping around like last time, i was more chill, and not that happy. I guess i am now used to be alone...although is kind of strange for me not to jump around for my friends visit.

So they came, as usually Friday morning, i was waiting for them. When my friends are here, i love the time we spend in the kitchen:). I guess this is the part which i miss the most, the time which you spend at the kitchen table, eating , drinking and speaking about everything. It is such a blessed time, amazing. So i can say that every time this is what i enjoy the most, and of course the tete a tete discussions with each one of my friends. Funny thing, that people are coming by car from Romania to Poland, just for talking with me, and asking me advices about work, life and other things. Sometimes i think i am crazy.
Anyway, Friday was just a chilling day, when people relaxed in the house, we had dinner in a really nice place which i love in Lublin, called Black Tulip, where the food and music is excellent.


Saturday, we decided to go to Warsaw, to visit, so we went in the morning. It was veryy cold. We visited the palace in Warsaw, which is really really nice, we ate some goffry with chocolate and cream, and we played with balloons. :)
We came back around 8 in the afternoon, all tired, and again, we sat at the same kitchen table, talking and joking around.
Sunday morning it was amazing, as we all went to church :) where we spent an incredible time, as there wes a baptism:). My friends the two girls were really impressed by the ceremony and by God's message, and i was very happy for that.:)
After that we went home for lunch, and we went out for ice cream. Sunday night we had a very nice time, playing cards, joking and having fun.
Monday the guys wanted to go in the office again:) to meet my team members, so i took them. People were very happy to meet them. I guess i am changing the polish mentality. If in June people were surprised when i brought one of my friends in office, this time it was kind of normal:) so all were happy.
After that we went to a shopping session, in which girls were shopping and me and my friend were talking about all things.

There were some challenges in his life and in mine as well, so we had a really nice, and tough talk, but i am happy we had it. I am not sure even today,if i should have told him all the things i did, but that was what i felt, that i needed to help him to focus on the important things, and not on the non relevant ones.
After that, they left:(. I prepared a small letter for each one of them, some words to encourage them, as each of them were having some challenges, So i wanted to encourage them, and to make them aware that i and God is there for them.
They went into the ZSZ car, and they left, and my house, and my heart was again empty.
This is the hardest moment, when people come, you have amazing time with them, and then ....the house is empty, no one at the table, all the house, is clean and empty, no more towels in the bathroom, Joy is searching for her new friends.....it is not easy at all.



And then I ve realized that I am again alone, for another 2 months, until hopefully i will go home for Christmas.
Funny thing, no matter how much time you spend alone, you are never completely used to it :(.

I have now 6 months since i am in Lublin, alone. I had 2 friends visits, and i was once home. God is giving me the power and the focus to move on.
Thank you Lord, and thanks to all the people that are with me, via phone, email or other way...

Cold October

October in Lublin is almost winter:) Basically is very cold, all the trees are slowly getting ready for winter, snow, and stronger wind:).
My baby Joy, is cold as well, so this is why i have order some clothes for her, which are really cute, but she does not really like to wear them. I dress her, we go outside, she walks 10 minutes and then she stops, and she does not want to move anymore. She is a very stubborn dog.
Anyway she is really cute in these new clothes, so i want to add her pictures here:)
Cause i love my sweetie pie!

Free nature

New month - new things - new season

Good morning all,
new month october is here, fall is coming in Poland, actually is here already and sometimes is really cold, but I guess this is normal.
At work all is well for the moment, i like the fact that i am alone around the office, so it is really nice.
Some friends of mine are coming again to visit me this month, so i am very excited as i will not be alone, and it will be really fine.
I went for a haircut and i paid a lot of money. I am used to my excellent romanian hair dresser Tanti Vio who is really cool, and she has excellent prices.
Now i had a shock when i realised the real prices of hair dressers, but anyway i will not go in the future, so mainly until next year i will not spent other amounts on hair dresser.
Speaking about hair dresser, i am Joy's hair dressser, and i added the below pictures:)
that's it for Poland for the moment :)

Achievements

Hei hei,
again it seems some time has passed by since i have made time to actually write on my blog. I should be more focused and start do this daily even from office during my breaks:). So what is new? Things are fine, i am still in Poland, Lublin, my work is going fine, and today i finally achieved one of my goals to get GB certified. So today 29th of September this happened, and not only i got the certification, but i ve received a good feedback from the lady who gave the certification. So overall a good day for me:).

What else i should add? My Joy is now a young lady, so she is experience all the feelings:) which causes some challenges for me, but nothing to complain about. In my life there is nothing new, same old stuff, i bought some books from Romania which i like, and i am very happy i am able to read them :).
I have been singing with the people from my church i love to do that, and then work work and work.
Also i have another good news, which is the fact that in one week my friends from Romania are coming to visit me again :) so i am so happpyyyy!!!

I guess i am happy, although is not that happiness that i had last time, now is a joy somehow, but i am not jumping all around. I am more reserved:) i am happy....but i am ok let's say :)))

Ok so basically these are the updates,

Keep looking for new info,

Take care,
Night night

And God Bless!

Disappointnement

Hei hei, an old post which i should have edited last week, but actually i am still disappointed today, but about new things. Well life is full of such things as disappointments, what should we do? Think twice and think about our reaction.
Think about the one and only model in our life, Jesus. How many time He was disappointed? How many people disappointed Him? How many brothers? How many situations and reactions? And what did He do? He decided to act differently and save the world by dying on a cross.
This thought should be in my mind and in any mind while we are going through disappointments.

So help us God.

Amen!

Hmm...

New day, new week, still alone.
It is very interesting, how people mind works. You can find motivation every day for being alone; you can see different sides of the problem, that you are alone, independent and all, but someday it will just hit you, out of nowhere, that you are actually ALONE.
When will this feeling pass? How people without families get use to this? When i will understand that this is something normal, and it is not so bad? I hope soon, cause it is not that easy.
I am now in Poland for almost 6 months (with 2 travels to home), and i still have 13 months to go, and i can not say that i am used to be alone. I am not. I miss my family, i miss my friends, i miss having friends:(.
Anyway, i need to adapt. But what is adaptations? Of course i feel adapted to Poland as i am alone! I have no friends:) so how can i not be adapted, interesting no ??? :)
I should go out and eat in the city. Hmm what will my dog say. My dog is a dog, she should not say anything.
So???
What will it be?

I am still deciding.
Anyway...i am out

Decision point

Good evening,
August is a lovely month, and it seems that things have settled for me here in Poland. However it seems that God is not willing to let me stay without any professional challenges.
So time of decision is here again, but this is not my decision i guess. It is strange, and i do not understand why these things are happening now.
I am very stressed, and it seems that the sensation is not willing to go away. I have a terrible head pain , it is like i have been drinking all night, but i did not :(
I know God will find a way, so please God help me out here.
Thank you!

Last post for the month of July

I guess this is the last post for the month of July.
What can i say?>
things are still the same, i am doing the same things, it seems like i am this Rappunzel girl from the Disney movie. I do the same things over and over again.
Today i was spontaneous though: after office i came and pick my Joy and went for a walk in the center, near the castle where i had a nice ice cream, and then we came home, i left her in the house and i went to Carrefour to buy some things for the house. I ended up spending a lot of money, buying a lot of things for Joy, and two pair of shoes for me. I just hope that these shoes will be ok, and comfortable, so let's hope.
What else? At work things are ok, let s say, there are some things which i do not really like, but overall i should not complain so much. Joy is growing and she is a very good dog. As good as she can be, as clearly she still has problems with doing her "things" outside. But other then this she is amazing. I am so happy that i have her, not sure what would i have done without her.
now to close for all you reader, remember:

All to Jesus I surrender, all to Him i freely give
I surrender all
I surrender all
All to Thee my blessed Saviour
I surrender all

THANK YOU Lord, for making me your child.
Thank you Thank you!

Loneliness hits again

Sunday mid afternoon, and i am at home. Weather looks really nice outside, but still it is too hot to go and roam around. So is better to sit inside, and watch some movies, read or listen to Abba :)
Yes these are my days. Although i am constantly motivating myself that it is great, the fact that i am here in Lublin alone, and i have my own place, my own dog, my own life, oao i am so satisfied. And this motivation works for some days, one, two, three even for a week. But then....one morning you wake up with an emptiness in your heart and soul, and you realise you are all alone.
I am a people person, i like people around me, and here, i miss them a lot. I am tired to talk in English and not in romanian, i miss my friends, i miss going out for a drink, and ice cream or karaoke. I miss spending time with my family. But, it is not time yet:).
This is a great experience i think. It will teach me to deal with the lonliness, and to start feeling happy with myself only.
I need to focus my attention more towards God.
I know He loves me, i know He is here with me every day, when i am happy or disappointed or alone, but still...it seems i still miss people.
Interesting no? It should not be like that.
God please help me in leaning on You when lonliness comes to me. There were a lot of people who made it, they sat alone for some time and time and time, and they become better persons that they were, God i want to be transformed by Your hand.
I am sorry for being such a spoiled kid. I know that You have give me all that i need here in Poland and still sometimes i am not happy or gratefull. God i know that all that i do not have here is because it is not needed yet. I know that You have a plan for me, and your plan is that I stay here for the moment, alone, feeling and knowing You better.
This is what i will focus on God. Knowing You better:) I think this is my opportunity.
Thank you for giving me this chance. Please forgive me ...

Happy Birthday ....to me:)

Well another year has gone by, and I actually didn't felt it. I am now 28 years old:) What can i say? I am old ...in a way. In another way I am still young and in love with life, and with nature and with people and with God.
Looking back it is amazing how God has guide me through life. My life was not at all easy, but now looking back i had so many blessings from his hand. When i had my 20th birthday i was in Frankenberg Germany, now after 8 years i am in Lublin, Poland:). In the meanwhile i visited Germany, Italy, Hungary, France, India and UK. Who would knew? That a poor girl, from a modest family will have so many blessings?
Thank you God! Thank you for taking care of my every step in all these years, thank you for giving me the right people to be sourrounded by. Thank you for giving me HEALTH. Thank you for giving me all the things i've needed. Thank you for you love that you give me every day.
I am amazed when i look at my life. And i know that in every step i took, You were there guiding me in choosing the right and not the wrong :)
Thank you!
Indeed now my life is kind of strange, as it is a period of knowing myself, and understanding life in a diffrent way then in Romania. Why? I am really lonely here in Lublin. I have few friends, which actually i am not sure if they are my friends or just people that i know. I am alone with my dog, and with God.
Sometimes i even think that depression might get me, but i do not believe in this simptom so i will not have it.
However a point that is almost getting to me is regarding relationships and love. Sometimes i find myself thinking to much about it. I would like to start a family someday. And in my plans this should happen before i am 30 years old:) So it is the final countdown. But as i said this is what is in my plans. Maybe in God's plan for me, the situation looks different. Maybe what i am doing now, or what i will do in the future will be more important than love, and building a family.
I need to learn again and to keep this lesson and have complete faith in God's plan for me.
Clearly they are better then mine, as He is the only one able to see the entire picture. So let's see what God will bring into my life:).
Thank you for being my God!

Cause i had a bad day...

so i had a bad day.
now is gone but i actually felt it.
it was deception mixed with angry, frustration and other small and strange feelings.
it is unique how God make things happen or not happen. When i was ready to move to another stage of my life, and i finally found again the courage to say what is on mi mind it seems that everybody had the same instictint in sharing what was in their minds. So everything has changed. I received a information which i was not expected to receive, and i just had a shock i guess:)
Anyway, now a day has passed over and all is ok.
I now know how the things are and what i need to do, which is actually nothing, just focus on my job, and my life, and fine equilibrium :)

Basically this is my bad day.
Not sure yet why God did the things in this way, but i am sure that He knows the right paths for me.

Thank you!

Back to my home in Lublin

Yesterday i reached home, after 2 weeks of well spent holiday. One of my friends here in Poland prepared a surprise for me. When i came the house was spotless so i just took a shower and went to bed. Not for long though, as it seems that the insomny is back with me once i am in Poland. I woke up at 5 o clock in the morning :).
I met my dog at 07 o clock and then we went back to sleep as we were both tired.
I am happy to be back in a way but i am missing home and family and all my friends.
This two weeks were great, i ve meet my friends on a daily basis and we had a lot of fun.
:)
Things are still not clear for me from diffrent aspects, however i am sure that i will find the right way.
In the meanwhile, it feels strange being alone again.
16 months to go:)

Smell and taste of vacation

Hello hello
it's been a long time since i had time to come back at my blog and write my thoughts down. Well i was pretty busy enjoying my vacation!!!!!!!
And it is great. So i had in Poland some of my friends visiting, 2 girls and one guy and we had an amazing time together: sightseeing, joking, having fun and not least worshipping God. There were 3 incredible days in Lublin.
Then we took the car and we went to a beutiful place here in Poland which is Krakow. And this city is amazing. There is so much beauty and history in one place that we where thrilled. We saw the castle, and the old city and we took a walk with the horses :). It was such a nice time and a great weather.
We found a good place to sleep and we had good rest and then in the morning we went to Auschwitz, where things are a little bit shocking for everyone i guess.
Although i was impressed about the size of the camp and the museum, and i was also touched by the things that happened there, there is also something in my heart that i do not really understand. People go to this place to visit and see, and they are all shocked about what happened. But on the other side even today in hospitals, and prisons there are still such things happening. Clearly not in the way or number as there, but still doctors are testing medicines on people, and still in prisons there are diffrent things happening, and still the society didn't learn any lessons. And this is what bugs me.

However, it is an interesting place to see, full of history.
After this visit we started our trip back to Romania, and the view was fantastic. Mountains, sun, clouds, all was green, and i was thinking to myself: OAO God You are AMAZING. All that my eyes see here it was made by your hand. And i felt happy :)
After a 13 hours drive we reached Cluj tired but happy, i came home and i met my family and my dog HAPPY :)
And since then i am meeting friends on a daily basis, and it is great to be back :)
I love it here on holiday!
I did not open my work computer yet, and it is almost a week since i am home. This is new for me:)
And i am happy.
Sunday in church was great, i missed being part of my church where everyone speaks romanian. My pastor was very happy to see me and this was a big joy for me.
Monday in 7 days i will go back to Lublin,
Vacation will be over for the moment.
Anyway hope that I will find time for another post during this period.

See ya later:)

Office office office

Good morning,
It is 11:14, the time in Lublin Poland and i am in office, in a call, GB call:).
I presented my project and all is ok, people kind of liked it i think.
Starting tomorrow i am officialy in holiday, for 11 days :) OAO. And my friends are coming in tomorrow, and we will visit Lublin and Cracow and the surrounding :). And then i am going to ROMANIA. I am going home for holiday, GREAT.

I will spend time with my dog Happy, and with my family and friends. Only sad thing is that my polish dog Joy will remain here in Lublin with one of my friends.

Anyway i will keep up with the postings,

Have a great day!

A cloud for Mozart

Two weeks ago i was taking my daily walk with my sweet dog Joy, and i took the camera with me as i wanted to take her some pictures, which i did. While we were sitting on the green grass, i noticed something really interesting. I guess everybody, especially girls love clouds. Well, i am one of the persons who often likes to sit in silence and watch the white clouds on the blue sky and imaginge, imagine and imagine. when i look at the clouds, i am thinking about their form, about that they are in God Kingdom, and that they are a miracle of the creation.
The cloud that i have seen that day, remind me of a wonderfull man Mozart.
Take a look! Was it only my imagination or this cloud really looks like him.
Would be interesting to have some comments on this post :D

Relaxing relaxing and relaxing

Hi again,
it s me again:) my sweet dog is home, and we are both relaxing on the balcony. she is lying on the floor, looking at the green grass and at some kids that are playing, and I am here writing about my day. The weather is beautiful, the sky is blue, there are big and puffy white clouds, and i just love them. I have today 05 th of June 2 months since i am in Lublin Poland. What can i say? Do i like it? Often this comes into my mind, and i do not know what should i answer. Do i like it? i am not sure. Sometime i do and sometimes not, so is this showing that i am not decided? or that i am unhappy?
I am thinking to do a list with likes and not likes for Lublin and for my situations:
LIKES:
- i have a nice appartment
- my workplace is nice
- i have good salary
- i have a dog
- i have a church
- i have guitar lessons
- i leave 5 min away from my job
- my landlords are really nice
- Anna P is a real friend
- my boss is ok
- my friends are coming to visit me
- i have nice neighbours
- i leave office at 16: 30 no overtime:D
- i speak on the phone everyday with my mother and sister

NOT LIKES:
- i miss my family and friends
- sometimes i feel lonely
- i do not have a lot of friends
- sometimes i get angry at work
- i miss my other dog

So clearly the list with LIKES is bigger that the one with NOT LIKES, so i guess i like it here in Poland:). Basically i am learning to be independent, to clean my house, to cook, to take care of my dog, to face all my fears, to get closer to God, to make new friends, and so on.
I guess this is an opportunity.
I just want to be able to see it like that even when i am not in a good mood.

And i want to be able to thanl God for this opportunity of being in a forreign country, and being WELL, and happy.
Lord, i take this opportunity to THANK YOU once again, for all your gifts to me. I am amazed by the work that you are doing in my life. You take care of all my needs, from the simple ones such as food and water to the more complicated ones. Thank you Lord for being my Father, and thank you for having patience with me.

In the name of Jesus.
Amin!

Lonely weekend

This weekend my dog is with one of my friends, as i am going back home for holiday and she will spend these weeks in the house of my friends as she is not ready to travel to Romania. So we decided that she needs to have a weekend in her temporary house, so this was the weekend.
Yesterday i was pretty lonely without my Joy:(, but today she will be back so i am very happy :) is going to be very good to have her back as i missed her soo much.
anyway i realised this weekend that it was a good idea having this dog, as it feels very strange again to leave alone in a 2 room apartment.

So Joy ...welcome back!!

kiss kiss

Thank you

Lord,

I know that i never have the time to thank you for the possibilities that you gave me to see the world.
I am the kind of person that was on a train at 20 years old:) And since then God has shown me the world.
I have been in Italy : Belluno, Milano, Venezia, Parma, Bologna, Torino, Treviso, Cortina, and then Germany (do not recall the name of the city :) ), Hungary Budapest, India Gurgaon, Delhi and Jaipur, and France Paris and Reims, and now Poland Lublin.
It is amazing how God has open the world for me. Thank you Lord, Thank you!
I am afraid to ask what will be next?
Where will God send me? What will be the next miracle He will show me.
God is my Father, and He takes care of me and all my needs.

Just a Thank You note Lord.
Thank you!

Singing for the Lord

When I sing for the Lord something changes. I am not sure what. It is strange how God touches your heart through singing. Although i am here in Poland and i do not understand yet Polish language, still i am able to sing and to feel God's presence when doing that. It is an amazing feeling.
i am the person who usually sings in pubs and karaoke bar's. However since i have turned to God, i am not doing that anymore, because i want to sing for Him. I now understand that the ability to sing was a gift to me from my Father and he should be the one enjoying this gift. This is why i decided to sing in church if possible.
I always wanted to sing for God, but everytime there was a problem, either i was at work and i was not able to join the singing meeting, or i did not know the songs and stuff like this. Since i am in Poland i give priority to these things but also the fact that my schedule allows me to be part at this it helps A LOT. So now, although i have my little Joy that cries everytime i leave the house, i go to every rehersal with joy and i am always praying to God that my heart stays open, and althogh i do not understand all words, as the language barrier is there, He makes me happy and gives me voice to sing for Him.
This Sunday will be the first time that i will sing in church, hope that all will be ok, and i will manage to give other people some hints about God's work in my heart.

Well this is about singing for the Lord.
Thank you!

New joy in my life - Joy

Lord, i want to thank You for one of the best gifts you had for me, the one and only Joy.
So just to have a quick update- I have a dog and i am so so happy.
Basically i have this dog since 3 weeks now, she is a Yorkshire terrier, named Joy. Why is she named Joy? Well she was a real Joy in my life, and second i chose a name who matches my other dog which is Happy:) So now i have a Happy and a Joy:).
She will be 4 months old next week, she is a really cute and smart dog, although sometimes she is very stuborn.
Since i have her here in Poland, i am more comfortable in the house, and i get out often with her, so it gives me a lot of things to do.
And i am very glad for that.
Maybe I should have thought more when i bought her, but i really wanted someone here with me, and i just love dogs so...here she is.
She is still getting used to stay alone in the house, as i need to go to work every day:), but she will adjust to this in some time, i hope:)
Also i will go home for 2 weeks in June, and here comes the real challenge, as there are only two option: option 1 i take Joy with me:), and option 2 i leave her with one of my team members, i have not decided yet which option should i take:).
Tomorrow we are going to the vet, and i guess after this visit i will be able to take the decision.
So mainly this is it about my Joy:) Enjoy the pictures:)

First Easter in Poland

Easter is almost over, today is the Second day, starting tomorrow back to work. Holiday is over, and for some people also the thought about God.
What is about all this Easter? Why do we have it?
For me Easter was just a normal classic holiday in which we eat a lot, drink a lot and watch TV. And that was it, no particular meaning, although in TV there were like a lot of priests speaking about religion. And that was it.
From a couple of years now i ve started to see Easter differently, i have started to finally understand the meaning of this particular celebration. It is a celebration of death and live, it is a celebration of hope and of amazing joy.
Easter is very important as it is the day when Jesus won the world for us. He was crucified like a lamb, because of our sins. And the 03rd day he rise from the death, showing us that all of us who believe in Him and follow Him will have eternal life.
This year was my first Easter after i ve been baptized. Although now i understand more things and i now the kind of life that i should have and live, i am still not doing it as it should be:(. And this is what i have seen during this particular Easter. It seems like i am not reading the Bible, i am not praying enough. I do not know why. Maybe because i am all alone here, i have this tendancy of doing all other things but not to sit in God presence. This is what i have realised, that although i ve been baptized i am still a sinner. And i am very happy that Jesus took my sin's whith Him at the cross.
I would like to be more responsible about this relation with God. I want to be more interested in understanding the word of God. I want to feal God's presence in my life every minute. I know He is with me.
God please help me proritizing my life for You. There is nothing more important in my life then You.
Thank you !

My new appartment

Finnally i found my appartment, which is very close to office, so in the morning i can wake up late and go to office. Also is very close so that in lunch brakes if i want i can come back home for lunch, so it is very comfortable.
Is quite a nice appartment that i found and it is also at a good price. It is in a new flat, and it has 2 rooms and kitchen and bathroom. There is very little furniture so it looks kind of empty, but i guess i am getting used to it as empty as it is.
Sometimes i feel very lonely in this appartment as i am alone, so i am now thinking to buy a dog, although i am not that sure that i will have time for this animal which requires special care and attention.
So basically i am in contradiction because even now, i am thinking to buy one, but a couple of minutes ago i was convinced that is not such a good idea, so i guess i am kind of crazy:).


also there is another possibility which is to go and be a volunteer at the pound, which casually it is here near my appartment, so i guess it would be a perfect solution. Tomorrow my boss will take me to this pound so that i can check it out, and i will speak with team and let's see what can i do. Maybe i can go and play with the dogs, walk them even there. That should be awsome:).
I have added some pictures with my new flat, now i just need to buy some more things, as it is not fully equiped, and with the risk of repeating myself , it is an empty appartment. I can not wait for my friends from Romania to come and see it:).

Hope that day will come soon. Although my friends were planning to come here in May or June, it seems that due to various reasons this is not duable, so who knows when they will be actually able to come. This is a bad news for me, as i was very happy when i have heard that there might be a chance that they come.



Howver let's see how things will work out:) In the meanwhile, enjoy my new appartment from the pictures.
See ya later,

Life without computer's

This weekend i have experienced an entire weekend without tv or computer. And it was amazing.
What did i do? just relax, roam around my new appartment, go out in the city, read, pray and have a wonderfull time.
I have also tried to develop my artistical skills, so my friend and i went to the shop and bought some painting with Winnie the Pooh. So we started painting and painting and painting. And it is amazing how relaxing it is. To see the live colors of the paint, oao it was a great experience and i am planning to repet it.
I think it will help me to develop and to improve a missing skill in me, which is patient.
I need to be more calm, and not always in a hurry. So painting helps me with that.
But enough with the talking as i need to go to office, the paintings are below.
Hope you enjoyed reading this lines about my weekend.

Short story

This is me. I am a normal person i guess, however sometime i have diffrent ups and downs in my mind and in my life. So for example this weekend was a nice one, and week started well. I am still searching for a rent here in Lublin Poland, however it seems that prices are really high. I have seen three apartments untill now, i liked two of them very much, but in my oppinion the price is really high. So now i need to search something else quickly, otherwise i will take one of these two.
I did a mistake this Monday; i wanted to change my hair style a little bit, and i did it. I went to this saloon here in Lublin, called Bianco e Nero, and i had my hair done. And is very strange, i am not that happy with my new look. Actually i am kind of sad, because i ve been growing my hair from sometime now, and suddenly is kind of short., But i am sure it will grow back soon, so i do not want to stress about this.
At work things are going well, team is great and performance is a good one. I want to join a guitar course, classic guitar. So, tommorrow is my first lesson, and a free lesson. I hope it will be nice, cause i really want to get involved in extra activities, in order to meet people, and not to get bored. So I am very excited:D.

I miss my friends, every day is getting more difficult for me, but i am glad that there are people who are connecting with me. So all for the best!!!

Living in Lublin Poland

So, officially from 01st of April, actually from 05th of April i am living in Lublin Poland. As any new citizen in a new city i need to find a house. Currently i am staying in a nice hotel in the center of Lublin - Vanilla. Yes, interesting name, and what is even more interesting is that inside this hotel indeed there is a constant smell of Vanilla:). It is very nice. My room is a very purple room, i mean that walls, bed, courtains and chairs are all purple. So it is interesting. My small window is oriented versus the main center street, and first night here, i had a live band singing :). By live band i mean 3 guys, one with a guitar singing Polish songs. It was like a serenade, quite nice if i may say.
Tomorrow is Sunday and i am moving into a new appartment untill i find the final one. Let's see how this will be, i think it will be ok, nice and comfortable.
After that i will need to move into my final appartment for this 1.5 years that i will live in Poland. Actually...i did not find this appartment yet, and renting appartments is not my favorite job, not to forget that prices here in Lublin are not as small as i thought. So...fingers crossed for a nice appartment.
How is work? Well i have my office which is in an open area, and it is near the window, i have a new chair, which is blue and has a lot of features, so i guess you can actually sleep in this chair if you really want. I brought some pictures with my team and my friends, and i hang them near my office, so is quite cosy and nice:). With the Polish team, things are good, i think that we do not have so many challenges in communication. Sometimes is strange for me too, to see them talking and not to understand what they are saying but i guess this is normal in any forreign country.

That's it for the moment about my Polish experience ... to be continued:)

Sadness

What is this feeling that comes around and takes you by surprise? When you are under the impression that everything is ok, all is taking the right place in your normal life, you have one small feeling, that surrounds your heart. Physically you actually are able to feel it, is like something in your throat, is a tear in your right eye, is an invisible circle around your soul that is closing slowly.
Why you may ask? something happened? actually nothing happend is just a phase, in which loneliness reaches you, and you feel abbandoned by everyone.
You check your inbox every 5 minutes, and nobody is writing to you.
You are expecting that special email from that special someone and is not coming. And then your sadness and loneliness feeling grows and grows. I would love to have a dog, and have him close to me. I would love to have a friend with me. I would love to have a mother with me. I would love to have a sister with me. I would love to have a brother with me, i would love to have a soulmate with me.
I have God. It is true! I have my Father with me, so why i feel sad and lonely? Jesus is here, in the room with me. He is looking and me trying to get me out of this state of mind.
Question is: what will i do? Will i give Him a hand to help me out? or would i push back?

03rd April 2011 - Born again

Long time no seen.
Actually i have been home to Romania for a weekend, in order to celebrate my birth. You may say but it is not your birthday and you are right. This day was far much special then my birthday. Why? Because in this day i died, i died and i have been resurected by the love of God. I am a new person now. God has given me another opportunity to live my life in a diffrent way.
The celebration of this day was amazing. I was surrounded by my family and friends,brothers and sisters, it was amazing.
A day that i will always remember.
Thank you Jesus, for giving me another chance.

Travelling

Well finally i am going home to Romania for a weekend, and i am very happy. However i am tired. Today was Friday and i am up since 06:30 AM, i had a full day of work and then i reached Warsaw airport, where i sat for some hours and i got bored. This boring period develped a set of great pictures and i was able to see an amazing sunset from the Warsaw airport. Took the flight and as there is no direct flight to Cluj, my city, i ve reached Budapest, where again i need to wait a couple of hours more. Good news is that i have internet :) So i am not that bored.

I am very tired. I can not wait to arrive home and have a good slep:) Of course i want to see my family and my pets:) i missed them so much.

So...this is it, airport looks fine, all good, 35 minutes to go, and then another our and a half and i am at home:)

Just for a weekend though,

Bye bye...