Another special day for special people

The celebration continues, looks like everyone is getting married and setting up families. That makes me feel happy and a bit sad, but is a reason of joy and blessing.
Yesterday was the day when 2 more persons tight their lifes together. And I only wish them well, many many blessings and a happy life.
Of course some pictures will follow, but the point is that because of all of this I did something that I never did before. I ve allowed myself to think about how my day would like if ever.
And it will look great:)
But this is not the time or place for more details, so I ll just share the pictures:

As mentioned

Seems like i am out of ideas for this blog. Maybe because i miss my privacy back in the Poland days, or is it just that i m getting old, and i do not feel anymore so comfortable with letting it all out.
Not sure, but in the meanwhile another weekend is gone, hot weather, sweaty people, not something you want to see every day. Tomorrow a new work week is starting and i m not sure when or how it will end,
what i can say is that i m putting my efforts into it.
Every Sunday evening is the same, some people will come around to see what is new, some people feel lonely so they approach you....and what can you do?
Support unless it makes you feel bad.
Strange things , strange people, strange poetry:

I m closing my eyes and i see you
i want to open them but i can't
as mentioned i m caught in a sweet dream
with candies and pink champagne

tonight when i m falling asleep
and dearly reminding your kiss
as mentioned i m leaving my dream
a new life is there to begin

forever i will be with you
no matter the rain or the mood
as mentioned i m deeply in love
we re standing together on the edge



 

August Rush

Is almost August, time is passing so fast, and you can only look back, as forward is the unknown
The unknown is something scary, and this is why I find it easier to look back, evaluate and create short stories on how it would  have been, if that would have happened or not.
Maybe I am the only one doing that, sometimes it helps me and sometimes not.
They say you can share you frustrations, and the things that make you happy. Are we all doing that?
How real are we on a day to day basis? Are we really real? or we are just adapting based on the people we interact with?
What is regret?
Do I have regrets?
Why I have regrets?
and the story and questions can go on, and on
I am hoping that more people feel the same about these questions, it would be really strange to be the only one.
Once again I found my place, and once again is the wrong place. Why? why do i choose the wrong things for myself?
Question remains open for the month of August 

And here we are - Happy Birthday ...to ME :)

Almost there.....3 hours - countdown

They say I need a detailed and in depth conversation with myself. Is this true?
Do i need to look inside again and again?
I would need to face again this monster which is sadness? Maybe I should see a doctor, cause this sadness is not right, I should be happy, dreams are setting down, everything is working fine, but still I feel an empty space in my body and in my heart.
I feel a void and I am not sure what I need to fill it in...maybe is love, God, attention, care ? what????

Every year around my birthday i get a little bit sad, but now, this year feels like the worst of them all. I feel like i am alone, i have no real friends, I just have people around me, people that use me for various things, and that s it.
Is this feeling normal? Am i the only one having it?
The strange part, is that I am not able to cry, i think this is something that could help me, just have a moment, of crying.
I was reading yesterday evening, an article, where it was mentioned that people who suffered a trauma, will have repercusions throughout their lifes, Is this the case with my life?
I really can not put in the past what happened to me, to us?
You never realize how much something hurt untill sometime after, for me is 14 years and i feel it now, differently than I ever  did. Maybe that is the rootcause, that is the source of all what is happening now.
No, i am not having dark thoughts, i think that I am an optimistic person, but am i? Or I m just encouraging myself to be? cause that s what everyone expects from me?

 Well this was a discussion, between me , myself and I, and it helped, a little,

Will help more,
All will heal,
Heart, Body and Soul.
I sure believe this, and i know there is a Healer who is taking care of me. The problem is that is is coming towards me, and i run slowly but i run from Him. I need You , I need You badly. You are what can fill the void inside me, You are the center of my life, and that should bring me happinnees, cause I ll leave for ever with You
Help me, help me find myself again, and make me run back to You, cause Lord There is None like You!
 

Dream - Completed

Well the June 2014 month was a month of achievements, material ones more than spirituals but i know that all of these was done only with His help.
I had a dream, or better to say our family had a dream
and now that dream is becoming a reality!!!!!!!!!!
and it makes us all so excited!!!!

Dream - DONE :D:D:D

Smell and taste of vacation - Corfu 2014

And then again i m back from a lovely week in Corfu Greece.
The time there is awsome, there is sun and wind at the same time so basically is not that hot, so i m able to sit outside all day. This was a very nice and new thing for me.
I ve also spend more time in the water - i loved it, The salty water and the sun and the wind, it was very relaxing.
And i had also the chance of being alone and meditating on some of the things, it was great time and know I am fully charged!
But pictures show better the time spent there so...

Day out at Gilau!

For sometime now, we ve discovered the Gilau restaurant, which is near the lake.
We love the place there as the sourroundings are great, and the food and drinks as well.
So everytime we get an opportunity we are there.
This time we took some pictures, and as always here there are:

It s done - I am a driver!!!!!

11th June 2014- the day when I had the driving license exam, and i ve passed it!
It made me really happy, and even now thinking back i am still excited about it.
And i just need to buy a car....but let s see how we will work for that

:) I am HAPPY!!!!

Inside

Inside your soul there is a burden
You know is there for sometime
Let Jesus open up your heart
Your soul and body will revive

The burden that you have inside
I also know it very well
Although is very hard to tell
The Saviour is here let Him stay

Inside your heart there is despair
You feel alone and no one cares
But there a Man outside the door
Please run to Him and love will flow

The burden that you have inside
I also know it very well
Cause sometime back I felt despair
But Jesus showed me that He cares

Now is the time to free your soul
From all the fears you don't let go
Cause Jesus gave His life for you
Open your heart you ll see the Truth

The burden that you have inside
Is what will bring you close to Him
So let His blood flow to your heart
And live beside Him all your life

And we are almost back

Sometime back I gave up to one of the most important persons in my life. And why? Just because of the circumstances in our life. I kind of broke a good relationship that was there. People say often You are my person, or like in Grey's Anatomy, If i had a dead body to carry out from my house, you are the person i would call cause YOU are my person.
And that was what it was for me. My person. Which I ve almost lost.
Hopefully after some serious prayers and discussion the situation will go back, i am just so afraid that it would never be the same again.
Or I am just to week to admit that we are different, and we will be able to overcome this without looking back? Time will tell. But is has been a lonely time, and a challenging time to have no one to speak to. I mean always there are people around me, but that "person" if is not there, it makes a difference.
My life is changing in so many areas that I would need the advice, the talk, the discussion, the look and everything else that comes when we are together.
What happened made me think more about how fragile are our relationships, how easy they can vanish...
Sometimes pride comes in the way, and you need to be very wise to put it aside or else, you ll never be able to fix any broken friendship.

Is a good day for science I would say. And it will be a good month and year for science. Cause this will be fixed, and things will go back to how they used to be sometimes back. I can not continue to miss important things just because there are some issues to fix. Issues will be fixed in sometime, but what we have, will take more to fix than an issue, and is for sure more important then anything else.

I am confident that things will be ok, I am confident that we will go back, like below:

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Second Time in Oltenia

Oltenia Berindei - a place where not many people go visting, hence I was there already two times, and I am very excited to go a third time if opportunity will arrise.
This second time I went to be part of Scoala Altfel, which is a project to improve the children education from those parts.
It was a good time, and I had the chance to see God working again through the people I met, and the support I ve received.
Pictures.....please!